Last First Time

We all learn by experience but some of us have to go to summer school.” – Peter De Vries

This degree has likely been one of the most challenging things I’ve undertaken (and that’s including a master’s degree and moving across the world!). But it is far from one I will ever regret. I was thinking about this semester, and now that I have a job I love, have successfully made a career switch, and mostly all due to the fact that I undertook this challenge, felt like something should have felt more, right.

I thought I would wake up one morning and just “know”. Just be confident in coding something simple, be able to have regular discourse with a colleague without feeling like an imposter, or googling keywords. Needless to say, I didn’t have that “aha” moment, and I still feel just as confused as I did maybe, 6 months ago? But one thing has changed. The confidence of knowing that even if I fail or WHEN I fail, I will figure it out eventually. And that I did not have when I first started this program.

So while I may never wake up just knowing (and truthfully, with the nature of computer science, you never should), I will wake up every morning knowing I can succeed, or I can fail, but no matter how many times I fail eventually it will work. And it will become another great accomplishment. So on this last first beginning, I’m grateful to finally feel like I learned exactly what the goal of the program was teaching- the confidence to fail, and thus learn.

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