At the moment of this blog post being created, I have not touched anything about the UI of this website. I know that I currently have the mindset of “You’re not very good with aesthetic things. You never were very good at visual arts”. I also know that this is mainly because I know — that there is so much that I do not know. New things can often be daunting. For a person like me, new things rarely aren’t daunting. My mind quickly races with every possible thing that I need to learn about a task before I am allowed to be proud of myself. What are the things that I don’t know how to do, that I know of? How many concepts spiral into bottomless pits of information? Where do I start? How far into a rabbit hole should I go? Will this documentation even apply to my current goal? Knowledge is a gleaming obelisk, with its peak shrouded in the clouds.

Then I remember that I have two eyes. I remind myself how far I have come in life. How many new joys that I have found in the things that I previously thought impossible. I am at the precipice of a different life than I once had before. I thought that learning computer science, and how to code were unreachable goals that I didn’t have the capability to achieve. Yet here I am, in the last quarter of a CS program. I am so excited. I don’t remember the last time that I was giddy to learn something until I started this program. I am in constant awe of the things that humanity has accomplished in technology. The idea that someday soon I will be a part of this league of people, puts me in disbelief. Hopefully my journey will impress my colleagues, employers, and others like me. Most importantly I hope that I will impress myself. I can look in the mirror and honestly say that I am living my best life.

Truly these are the thoughts I must constantly remind myself. I have always struggled with starting tasks because I would not be able to see the end. Everything had to be perfect. But life isn’t like that. Life is dirty, unorganized, and chaotic. Remember to look at things in a different light. Embrace the mantra of “fail fast, fail often”. Embody the idea that “life is 90% what happens to me, and 90% how I react to it”. Remember that you have two eyes.