I’m a Beaver now…
So I started my OSU journey with the Post-Bacc Computer Science, one to be more marketable in an ever changing world, two, because it was the Pandemic and what did I have to lose, and three because I wanted to see if I was any good at this stuff.
I liked computers growing up. I liked learning. I liked logic. Sometimes I liked maths. What could go wrong?
Going back to school and working full time was challenging and taking two classes at a time was difficult. I made it through Discrete Maths and CS161. I made it through with a 4.0 and thought it might be good to slow down to one class at a time, which I did. CS162 was still challenging (remember I’d not coded before I started all this and I was starting everything after a heavy life reset).
At the end of CS162 I had switched to a new job (still not computer/science related, but paid the bills) and I was learning a lot. But life stepped in again.
Taking a step back…
Before the end of CS162, my mother passed away. It was still the pandemic (although she did not die of Covid) so I was not able to be with her or my immediate family. It was devastating. My mom was my Rock and my best friend. I had to grieve and something had to give.
Classes at OSU were a test. They were a test of “Is this right for me?” and “Can I really do this?” I was doing well and understanding things and enjoying learning, but without mom… I needed a break.
Getting back up
I took a year off. I still worked and did life. I grieved and did things I loved and things I think mom would have loved to see me do. It was a hard and good year.
After challenges and trials I decided to start things back up again. Could I really do this computer stuff? I had tried to do some coding in my year off, but really my heart wasn’t in it. Still I wanted to continue the journey I started. I’d start with Data Structures and if I wasn’t any good, I’d just say I gave it a try and call it good.
Starting back up was… difficult. I started all the assignments early. I did all the introductory review modules and at the beginning, I still felt lost.
And then… I didn’t. Things started to click and make sense. Pycharm debugger became my best friend. I poured over time complexities again and again. I drew out trees by hand and clicked through left child, right child… on and on. I made it through 261 and I honestly, thoroughly enjoyed it. I love Data Structures. It turned out to be a challenging and wonderful quarter and started an adventure in being a ULA for 261.
Perseverance
I pressed on with again another new job, taking two classes at a time, always with the idea. Let’s try this and see if I’m any good at it. I pressed on and I continued to enjoy things. It’s not that I didn’t struggle. OS nearly crushed my spirit (and it did crush my 4.0). I made it through.
When I started this program I had no idea what I wanted to do with it, other than I wanted to increase my chances of more gainful employment. I started becoming interested in cyber security and looked into adding that as a certificate.
Then I thought well, I’ll try Cryptography and if I like that then I’ll keep going. Again, it nearly crushed me, but I do enjoy those proofs. They are a pain, but thinking about things in a different way… I like it. Who doesn’t love a good XOR?
Here I am. I’ve extended my time with OSU for an additional year to get all of my Cyber Security credits for the certificate, but where once I was aimless, just trying things out, now I have purpose. I may never get a job in Cyber Security, but I want to try. I will continue to try and push and struggle and learn. This may never be my career, but I am enjoying the journey and will continue to learn and grow along the way.
