In my last blog post, I discussed my confusion on what to do next in life. The post focused on whether I should continue my passion for education and pursue a master’s degree, or stick to finding a job in this grim market. While writing out my thoughts did help me understand the source of my anxiety, unfortunately, I haven’t come to any conclusions on what exactly the next move will be. In fact, I’m even more lost because I’m considering changing my entire path again. Okay, maybe that was a little dramatic, but I really am considering doing something I’ve always wanted to do—start a business.
I’ve known this for a long time, even as a kid I was always “on the grind” trying to make money with different small businesses. From mowing grass, to selling ice cream at the local flea market—providing goods to customers was something that made me truly happy. And the profit at the end of the day was just icing on the cake. Whenever someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I would say that I wanted to be a business owner. This was actually still the goal as I went into my first corporate job. I remember telling myself, “I’ll just work for a few years to save up some capital, then I’ll start a gym.”
As I got older and wiser, so to speak, I slowly lost sight of this goal. Each time I would sit down and research starting a business, the excess of planning and requirements would leave me feeling completely daunted and overwhelmed by the end of the session. I could maybe see it happening if I took a huge risk, but it always felt a little too far out of reach to commit. Additionally, I realized that corporate careers provided a level of comfort and security that is extremely hard to match. Eventually I stopped thinking about the dream of a business altogether, especially over the last two years while I’ve been focused education.
It has been an incredible two years—as this journey comes to an end, I find myself reflecting on all of my accomplishments. While I believe it would be a lot of fun to use this knowledge in a corporate environment, the bottom line is that I’m proud of what I’ve achieved, whether I use the degree professionally or not. I have had no luck thus far, but I will keep trying to land a job for the time being. It’s clear that the economy is struggling at the moment, so I’m trying not to be too hard on myself for not securing anything yet. And yes, I know I started the search late, but I can’t go back in time. I am choosing to focus on what I can control, which is the here and now. Whatever I choose to do today, tomorrow, the next day, and so on; that will be what affects my future.
So back to the dilemma at hand. I’m simply lost. I’m a passionate guy who just wants to see people happy. There’s far too much pain and suffering in the world, and I’d like to contribute to reducing it somehow. Looking back, I realize that the only thing that stopped me from pursuing a business was my own fear, doubt, and lack of confidence. However, this degree program has given me a newfound tenacity; I believe in myself now more than ever. I’m definitely not excited to submit another job application, but you know what is exciting? The thought of maybe taking a risk and finally starting that business I’ve always dreamed of…
Is it time?
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