Hope anyone knows what lyrics those are.
So I landed in San Fran prior to going on to the east coast. If anyone has seen Dave Chappelle Live at the Filmore, you will know where this comes from. It’s like China said, “Bye, thanks for coming, come back again, we’re having a sale on Birkenstocks,” and then the US said, “Welcome to the United States of America, Bitch.” Nice. The security was such dicks. Take off your belt, shoes, and jacket unless you are old. Oh great. Now some old asshole is going to cause trouble with a bomb or some shit. Oh wait, they have x-ray machines and such…Why the f*** do I have to take anything off?? How about I take off all that and they tell me what I ate for lunch? Just saying, traveling in the US sucks so damn bad. They don’t even do it with a smile and are so very rude.
So after all that, I went on to Boston where my friend Kate and Ryan picked me up from the airport and we drove back to Providence. The next am, she took us to the beach. I passed by sand and we drove further. We ended up on this rocky looking beach. I didn’t see sand, but thought it was around, the rocks looking just like Pacific City rocks. Nearly exactly. She sat and chatted with Ryan. I looked around, taking in everything having just been on land for the first time since China. There are slimy rocks there where their slime doesn’t look green. The dangerous rocks look exactly like any others. I thought to myself, “I’ve never touched North East ocean. I’m gonna do it!” I stepped towards the ocean rolling up the rocks, slipped on slime, slid down the rocks to the ocean. At this point I realized that there was no sand like at Pacific City and I was in real trouble. There were a few barnacles on the rocks that cut me to bits. My butt being the worst. I screamed. My friend Ryan thought I saw something cool like Dolphins. He knowing me thought I was all nature freaked and in awe. They couldn’t see from where they sat what trouble I was in. Luckily he is like 6’4 or taller and stood up, saw my panicked face, heard my help help help, and came running. I thought for a second, then said, “NOOOO! Stop!” He didn’t. I knew that he could be in the same death trap as I was. I thought we both would die now. He ran, slipped on the same slime rock, but with his tallness, held on to some none slime and plucked me from the water. The waves came up and pulled me down further as there was nothing to climb up that wasn’t slimy and only barnacles to cling to, which I did. Water causing you to float doesn’t let you cling to anything. There was only about a foot of me still above the rocks and the rest of me in the water. He saved my life. As I was exploring, pre-slip, Kate was telling Ryan that 5-6 people every year on those rocks die cause they don’t see the slime. One slips in, and one or two try to save them, and they all die. The rocks there come to a drop off 80 feet under water. There are caverns dug out by the water hitting so many times at different places so when people fall in, the under tow takes them down, shoves them into a cavern, and they drown. The cuts on my *ss still hurt, but I am alive thanks to Ryan. I joke that I only have 4 or 5 lives left assuming I had 9 in the first place. My life flashed before my eyes and I thought, “My family is going to be so pissed!”
The couple days after this I went to Maine to visit Andy’s family. His mom is so beautiful and lovely! She is a gem and I miss her so much. I can’t wait to see her again. Andy’s dad is exactly how I thought he’d be. Awesome, smart, and a serious golfer. Shhh…. lol!!! I would love to bring some basketball fans to a golf match… hahahhahah Met his Uncle David too. Great guy. Funny too. We visited Fort Knox Maine and explored. Spooky and fascinating! On the way we stopped at the coolest and one of the smallest flea markets. Found awesome treasures! I am collecting license plates for my garage decor. Anybody that wants to donate any to me, AWESOME! =D
Now home. My dog sounded like a girl when he saw me. Lasted at least 15 mins too. My cat Miko missed me and purred in my face just before smashing his face into mine, bad cat breath in all…Love. Kissed my kids in bed. House could have looked ten times better. Exhaustion kicked in after an hour and felt so unbelievably tired. Best night sleep ever!!! Glad to be home. I can’t wait to go back to school and see all my favorite professors. Have only seen a few friends so far and look forward to seeing more. My first stop after getting home that night, Winco for some good old Oregon brew! Oh how I missed you! Who has the best beer? OREGON! Sorry Maine, eat your heart out. Oregon’s got ya! muuhahahha~!